My dream recall is better since I stopped taking Zoloft, but I don't always feel like I just have to write my dreams down. Much to my annoyance, I finally have a few observations to talk about.
I went to bed feeling slightly agitated because shortly before getting to bed, I got an e-mail about the fees Wells Fargo is implementing and I don't think I'm going to be able to avoid them. I don't want to pay the bank $10 a month, so I'm probably moving my money to a credit union. I'm not really worried about my ability to do that, but this sort of thing is just plain irritating by its very nature. I'm going to have to update my credit card information on various web sites and crap like that, which is really annoying.
I'm wondering if going to bed feeling the slightest bit stressed fuels bad dreams. I had one of those dreams where my mom was tearing into me about something while I tried to climb a staircase to get away from her. I don't know what started it, but at one point, she started mocking me for crying, which is something she did in real life. These dreams usually make me feel angry and helpless, but for some reason, I had a pretty good grasp on what was happening, and I managed to fight back. I said something like, "Oh, well, I'm sorry I'm not being an adult and lashing out at other people just to make me feel better about myself." I wasn't paying much attention to her as I climbed the stairs and I eventually got rid of her.
There was a scene shift, and suddenly I was with some random people who were apparently part of my family -- I think my dad and maybe some of Dave's brothers were there, but here were other people and some random children -- who were discussing where to go for burgers. They talked about the merits of some fictional place over some other fictional place and I suppose they eventually made a decision. All I know is I turned around and they were gone. Some random kid appeared and informed me that they were all in the car and almost ready to go. I wasn't sure I could catch up with them, but I decided to try. After all, it was my dream. :P
I went to retrieve my shoes from an unfamiliar van. I started putting on my shoes and my mom showed up.
"I know what you're doing," she said.
I don't remember exactly what I said, but I calmly told her that I was just going to get some burgers.
"That's not what you're doing. You just tried to lure me out here to get my attention so you can get back at me for yesterday."
She was referring to her yelling at me earlier in the dream, but other than that, I have no idea why she thought I'd set up some kind of trap, and I'm pretty sure I pointed that out to her. She started yelling at me again, but I wasn't affected by anything she said. When I became aware of this, I started thinking her anger was funny. I firmly said, "It's ironic that you think everything I do is about you, considering you often claim I make things 'all about me.' I'm glad I don't live with you anymore." I wanted to say a few other things to her, but I woke up.
I think a couple of things influenced this dream. I mentioned the general unease with the bank stuff. but earlier that day, I'd also thought a little bit about just how hard it was for me to talk to my mom about moving out, so I guess these things got all mixed up.
I wonder if I'm going to have dreams like that again. My mom practically reached Person In the Ceiling status in that dream.